Enthralling fate.

It’s strange and fascinating how memories are triggered by the smallest of things. A song, a letter, a message, a film, a place…anything and memories form in your mind like they happened yesterday. I was just scrolling through my wallposts from 2010 on Facebook and remembered some of that year…the friends I had, the relationship I was in. One of the strongest memories I have is my first relationship, it’s so strange what can bring memories back to you. It doesn’t play on my mind or anything but it makes me think that even when something is so long in the past those memories will be triggered just as easily.

Life is always changing, each year is very different from the last…it’s always strange to look back.

Because it seems to be never-ending. It’s exhausting. All I can do is put all my time and effort into work, when I’m on the course. But I don’t even know if I’ll get a career out of it…A minimum of seven years of my life and I may just get a piece of paper. But I think everyone should follow their dream. What is life without happiness? Pointless existence. Waiting for opportunities. Hoping for something better. I know that too well. Maybe if I dedicate my life to something things will be better…

It’s been a while since I’ve been on Tumblr (again) and I have no idea why but I’ve been looking through my posts…been going way back. I’m surprised how open I used to be in my writing. Blogging is my thing, you know…every person I get close to knows I like to write. Reading through it has made me realise I like storing my thoughts, emotions and memories. I’ve missed it…But I often don’t know what to write anymore. With online writing, the fear of people finding your blog is always there…for me anyway. I guess people are very judgemental.

Something occurred to me recently. A simple thought. Everyone seeks their own happiness. Seems obvious, right? Well I realised that to find your own happiness you have to screw a few people over along the way…It doesn’t mean that you want to, it’s often inevitable. I guess when you truly accept that you resent a little less and you forgive a little easier.